Sometimes Grief Barks Up The Wrong Tree

Download or read book Sometimes Grief: Barks up the Wrong Tree written by Vincent Quatroche and published by Xlibris Corporation. This book was released on 2011-12-07 with total page 207 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: The title for this collection of prose and poetry Sometimes Grief barks up the wrong tree came to me in the late Spring of 2011 during an ensuing period of significant change and a series of disappointing struggles with some of the more harsh realities of life. The passing of my Father on Easter Sunday was hardly an unanticipated event. His decline was (for the most part) mercifully brief and he left the earth with loved ones present, in his own home and quite peacefully. The rituals of saying goodbye were observed with the usual decorum and to be honest? That part of dealing with the inevitable demise of life of a beloved father was actually a quiet sort of sad comfort in the memory of a good man and vibrant artist. I thought I was adjusted to that. Not so. What ensued on a personal level was a real old fashion shit storm of confusion, doubt, despondency and loss. Normal you say? To be expected? Perhaps. On the surface maybe, but such a world of chaos descended that it virtually affected every aspect of my life. And then one late Spring morning after teaching a class at a local community college a phrase resounded in my mind as clear as a bell. Sometimes grief-barks of the wrong tree. It was a revelation really. Surely not an answer to anything, merely a sort of internal realization. A recognition. I was in fact grieving, angry and ashamed that my intense personal feelings of sadness and loss were not wholly directed to my Dad being gone. No. I was furious the world with all of its confusion, contradictions and uncertainties that had encroached upon what I perceived should have the appropriate grief towards my recent loss. I felt my emotional interior had been hijacked by worldly concerns. Someone or something was diverting and demanding my attention and energy towards a dead end of self centered remorse, regret and devastation. Intellectually I accepted, (even understood) someone very close to me had left. Died. But I discovered much to my embarrassment that I was ill-equipped to deal with the more collateral damage of the off-the-rack influence of others in my life and while it was true I once cared deeply about them, I now had to face the unpleasant truth that the relationship with them had now gone toxic and was damaging and draining my strength to move on to the next chapter of my life. I couldnt let it go. And the same time it was like holding a burning white hot ember in the palm of my hand. I responded by closing my hand into a fist and holding the pain tighter. I ran wildly with it, quitting long time teaching positions that represented normalcy, purpose and economic stability. In short ? I was gutting my life. Serving every tie, except the right one. I was determined to hold on steadfast to that smoldering coal in my fist. I wondered what would come first. It would simply burn out or burn a whole through my flesh. At this point I must make this clear. There was yet a third level to the grief. I felt I was being delusional. Indulgencing in private, pointless emotional suicide. I was trying to kill my feelings while entire world out there had real problems. Serious tangible sorrows and pains that dwarfed my perceived issues and again I was ashamed at my transparent mini-drama I was perpetrating upon myself. Shutting it all down inside myself switch by switch. My mothers situation for example certainly could be taken into account. She had lost her husband and life companion of over fifty years and now at an advanced age herself had to deal with his absence on daily basis in the family home they shared practically their entire adult lives. Ive provided a unique perspective into her own experience in dealing with grief in the section of this collection entitled The Edna Variations. So I did the usual self medicating prescriptions that depressed individuals do. With a vengeance. Thankfully I eventually grew bored with that. So I returned to an old friend. My oldest friend. My self- expressi

Download or read book Got Abstract? written by Vincent Quatroche and published by Xlibris Corporation. This book was released on 2014-08-12 with total page 172 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: Got Abstract? is Vincent Quatroches look at the linguistic shadow world between the relationship of language and meaning in a literal sense of fundamental comprehension. Questioning the accuracy of the written word within the readers perception his concept of composition as taking emotional stenography relates to method rather than theme. Fragments abound, vague implications, aftershocks, repercussions, and a dark foreshadowing endeavoring to balance a few laughs (intentional or otherwise) the usual suspects are reinvented as old dwarfs for a new ceremony, some questionable propositions and an extended holiday for non-sequiters. In short the collection is an abstract painting speaking. The author provides the lines and invites the reader to color. While the instrument of this act will range from a flame thrower to a fire extinguisher this is your chance to circle dance in Trace/Schemata Tarantella. For some the title Get Abstract? Will invoke a dairy product advertising slogan, to which the author counters with Robert Mitchum in the kitchen growling a voice over Copelands Hoe-Down from the Rodeo suite..Beefits whats for dinner.

Download or read book Q Bop City written by Vincent Quatroche and published by Xlibris Corporation. This book was released on 2018-07-20 with total page 192 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: Q Bop City is given the existence as uttered forth in the public works of Puncher and Wattmann of a personal God quaquaquaqua with white beard quaquaquaqua outside time without extension for reasons unknown in spite of the tennis on the beard the flames the tears the stones so blue so calm alas on the skull in Connemara in spite of the tennis the labours abandoned left unfinished grave still abode of stones in a word I resume alas abandoned unfinished the skull in Connemara in spite of the tennis alas the stones Cunard (mle, final vociferations) tennis... the stones... so calm... Cunard... unfinished... by Samuel Beckett More info www.rubbereden.com

Download or read book Retread Rubbereden 2020 written by Vincent Quatroche and published by Xlibris Corporation. This book was released on 2020-06-25 with total page 251 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: “Quatroche is primarily an oral poet, influenced by and working in the tradition of Whitman, Sandburg, Ginsberg, Frelinghetti, Ken Nordine, Tom Waits, Charles Bukowski and similar experimenters in the American oral tradition. His work expresses a strong element of social criticism–sometimes angry, sometimes ironic or absurd, with the element of the highly personal and lyrical. One of his greatest strengths is the effective use of telling details and powerful images and metaphors to bring us face to face with our foibles, our failures and our loves- David Lunde Professor Emeritus SUNY Fredonia. Internationally published and recognized poet/translator. 1992 Rhysling Award recipient Five time Nebula Award nominee. Additional info Cyber Vanity mirror @ www.rubbereden.com

Download or read book 3 Nylon Lemons written by Vincent Quatroche and published by Xlibris Corporation. This book was released on 2023-07-30 with total page 175 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: 3 Nylon Lemons is divided into three sections: A collection of poetry written forty plus years ago- Some fragments of my fathers’ writing I discovered in his personal archives after his passing-and current work of my own collected since 2020 publication of Retread Rubber Eden. Lucky Ward (a constant theme named after a beloved teenage companion) is a series of prose snap shots of a Nursing Home I worked in as a very young man called Villa Care in Bellingham Washington in the late 70’s. Terrible Now that advanced age has visited me, I can only look back at those words and shake my head in amazement. The fiction of those days has become Stark Reality. With some very minor editing the original perspectives remain intact. This collection concludes with current prose/Poetry and stories that emerged from our post-pandemic world.

Download or read book When Grief Is Complicated written by Dr. Alan Wolfelt and published by Companion Press. This book was released on 2018-03-01 with total page 177 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: After a significant loss, grief is normal and necessary. But sometimes a mourner's grief becomes naturally heightened, stuck, or made more complex by especially difficult circumstances, such as suicide, homicide, or multiple losses within a short time period. This is called “complicated grief.” In this primer by one of the world's most respected grief educators, Dr. Wolfelt helps caregivers understand the various factors that often contribute to complicated grief. He presents a model for identifying complicated grief symptoms and, through real-life examples, offers guidance for companioning mourners through their challenging grief journeys. This book rounds out Dr. Wolfelt's resources on the companioning philosophy of grief care, making it an essential addition to your professional library.

Download or read book Born Into Loss written by Sarah Reed Vollmann and published by Rowman & Littlefield. This book was released on 2024-12-03 with total page 301 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: Subsequent siblings, who are sometimes referred to as replacement children, are people who were born after the death of a brother or sister. Little has been written about them or from their perspective. This non-fiction, self-help, psychology book breaks new ground by assembling rich and heartfelt life stories from a diverse group of subsequent siblings while also weaving in clinical literature and discussion. It is based upon more than one hundred subsequent sibling interviews, which, to the authors’ knowledge, currently comprises the largest and most diverse sample of this group. Through the subjects’ engaging narratives the reader can understand some of the common obstacles and repercussions of the subsequent sibling role. Additional testimonies from parents and surviving siblings illuminate the multilayered impacts of loss upon a family system. Those who are born after a deceased sibling enter a family that has been forever changed by loss. This book provides a brief overview of the research on subsequent children and the concept of the replacement child. It examines the parental experience of the death of a child, the complexity of pregnancy after loss, and the intrauterine and attachment experiences of children born after loss. The death of a child causes immense parental pain and impacts parenting approaches, perhaps resulting in impaired bonding or overprotectiveness of subsequent children. Some subsequent siblings are expected, consciously or unconsciously, to serve as a replacement for their lost sibling and to fill the void of loss. A variety of replacement dynamics can occur, and in some instances the subsequent child is viewed as an inadequate substitute for a deceased and idealized sibling. This book explores common issues that are faced by subsequent siblings, which include impaired bonding with parents, a sense of pressure to heal their families, survivor guilt, phobias, difficulties with identity formation, and the shouldering of caretaker roles. Their loss and experiences are often unrecognized because they were born after their sibling's death. Like most mourners, many subsequent siblings need to make meaning of their loss. It is often complex for them to grieve for an unmet sibling, or to integrate their sibling's death into their life story. Many subsequent siblings also recognize strengths that they have gained because of their role. This book includes chapters about surviving siblings and children who were born after a sibling with special needs.