Confessions Of A Bad Mother

Download or read book Confessions of a Bad Mother written by Stephanie Calman and published by Pan. This book was released on 2005-09-08 with total page 248 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: Funny, acutely observed, frighteningly honest and drawing on her own and hundreds of other mum's real experiences, Stephanie Calman serves up the perfect antidote to all those books that tell you that your children must be perfect, and to all those Stepford mums and kids out there who look as if they just might be: perfectly groomed, perfectly behaved and perfectly brilliant. The reality, as we all know, encompasses sleepless nights, no sex for years, baby sick on your best cashmere cardy, the terrible twos and then, just when you thought it was safe to go back in the sitting room, terrible teenagers whose only means of communication is the slamming door or the grunt.

Download or read book Confessions of a Scary Mommy written by Jill Smokler and published by Simon and Schuster. This book was released on 2012-04-03 with total page 178 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: Sometimes I just let my children fall asleep in front of the TV. In a culture that idealizes motherhood, it’s scary to confess that, in your house, being a mother is beautiful and dirty and joyful and frustrating all at once. Admitting that it’s not easy doesn’t make you a bad mom; at least, it shouldn’t. If I can’t survive my daughter as a toddler, how the hell am I going to get through the teenage years? When Jill Smokler was first home with her small children, she thought her blog would be something to keep friends and family updated. To her surprise, she hit a chord in the hearts of mothers everywhere. I end up doing my son’s homework. It’s wrong, but so much easier. Total strangers were contributing their views on that strange reality called motherhood. As other women shared their stories, Jill realized she wasn’t alone in her feelings of exhaustion and imperfection. My eighteen month old still can’t say “Mommy” but used the word “shit” in perfect context. But she sensed her readers were still holding back, so decided to start an anonymous confessional, a place where real moms could leave their most honest thoughts without fearing condemnation. I pretend to be happy but I cry every night in the shower. The reactions were amazing: some sad, some pee-in-your-pants funny, some brutally honest. But they were real, not a commercial glamorization. I clock out of motherhood at 8 P.M. and hide in the basement with my laptop and a beer. If you’re already a fan, lock the bathroom door on your whining kids, run a bubble bath, and settle in. If you’ve not encountered Scary Mommy before, break out a glass of champagne as well, because you’ll be toasting your initiation into a select club. I know why some animals eat their young. In chapters that cover husbands (The Biggest Baby of Them All) to homework (Didn’t I Already Graduate?), Confessions of a Scary Mommy combines all-new essays from Jill with the best of the anonymous confessions. Sometimes I wish my son was still little—then I hear kids screaming at the store. As Jill says, “We like to paint motherhood as picture perfect. A newborn peacefully resting on his mother’s chest. A toddler taking tentative first steps into his mother’s loving arms. A mother fluffing her daughter’s prom dress. These moments are indeed miraculous and joyful; they can also be few and far between.” Of course you adore your kids. Of course you would lay down your life for them. But be honest now: Have you ever wondered what possessed you to sign up for the job of motherhood? STOP! DO NOT OPEN THIS BOOK UNTIL YOU RECITE THESE VOWS! I shall remember that no mother is perfect and my children will thrive because, and sometimes even in spite, of me. I shall not preach to a fellow mother who has not asked my opinion. It’s none of my damn business. I shall maintain a sense of humor about all things motherhood.

Download or read book Confessions of a Domestic Failure written by Bunmi Laditan and published by MIRA. This book was released on 2017-05-02 with total page 209 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: From the creator of The Honest Toddler comes a fiction debut “perfect for readers looking for a funny, realistic look at motherhood” (Booklist, starred review). There are good moms and bad moms . . . and then there are hot-mess moms. Confessions of a Domestic Failure introduces readers to Ashley Keller, career girl turned stay-at-home mom who’s trying to navigate the world of Pinterest-perfect mommies. When Ashley gets the chance to enroll in a mommy-blog maven’s Motherhood Better boot camp, she jumps at the chance to become the perfect mom she’s always wanted to be. But the pursuit of perfection has a way of going perfectly wrong. With her razor-sharp wit, Bunmi Laditan creates an unforgettable and hilariously relatable character while lambasting the social pressures every new mother faces. “Freaking hilarious. This is the novel moms have been waiting for.” —Jenny Lawson, #1 New York Times–bestselling author of Let’s Pretend This Never Happened

Download or read book Confessions of a Bad Mom... written by Meghan K. Dwyer and published by Createspace Independent Publishing Platform. This book was released on 2017-10 with total page 192 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: In Confession of a Bad Mom, you'll find real-life thoughts about parenting, enhanced by my children's take on things. It's my honest thoughts on being a mother of four beautiful and precocious children. Their hilarious quips and comments are enough to keep you reading. I hope you'll find some solidarity as well as humor in this collection of comments and thoughts. At the very least, it'll make a good bathroom read!

Download or read book Drunk Mom written by Jowita Bydlowska and published by Penguin. This book was released on 2014-05-27 with total page 234 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: “An intense, complex and disturbing story, bravely and beautifully told. I read Drunk Mom with my jaw on the floor, which doesn’t happen to me that often.” —Lena Dunham Three years after giving up drinking, Jowita Bydlowska found herself throwing back a glass of champagne like it was ginger ale. It was a special occasion: a party celebrating the birth of her first child. It also marked Bydlowska’s immediate, full-blown return to crippling alcoholism. In the gritty and sometimes grimly comic tradition of the bestselling memoirs Lit by Mary Karr and Smashed by Koren Zailckas, Drunk Mom is Bydlowska’s account of the ways substance abuse took control of her life—the binges and blackouts, the humiliations, the extraordinary risk-taking—as well as her fight toward recovery as a young mother. This courageous memoir brilliantly shines a light on the twisted logic of an addicted mind and the powerful, transformative love of one’s child. Ultimately it gives hope, especially to those struggling in the same way.

Download or read book Confessions of a Failed Grown-Up written by Stephanie Calman and published by Pan Macmillan. This book was released on 2009-06 with total page 340 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: A brilliant new look for bestselling author Stephanie CalmanIn Confessions of a Bad Mother, Stephanie described how she brought up her children 'wrong'. Now she unlocks her singular inability (but one which secretly we all share) to grow up: forty-five last birthday but she doesn't feel any older, but of course she does - as in deafer, stiffer, and less able to read the dosage instructions on a bottle of Calpol. But the supposedly normal challenges of human existence feel frequently as though they are beyond her. Life is constantly confusing, frustrating and, at times, overwhelming. At forty-five - but only on paper - she's still a child in a suit, bluffing her way with one eye looking over her shoulder, expecting any minute to be found out and taken back to the nursery. Of course, that isn't such a bad place to be. Sometimes she even wants to go back there, but is cruelly aware that she no longer fits the chairs. Also featuring Things to Cook in Stilettos When You're Drunk, Why I am a Time Lord, A Hundred Ways to Wreck an Evening, Ten Things They Don't Tell You in Biology and The Grown-Ups' phrase book, Stephanie Calman's candid, touching and hysterically funny new book gives hope to bad mothers and failed grown-ups everywhere: read it and know that you are not alone.

Download or read book Confessions of the Other Mother written by Harlyn Aizley and published by Beacon Press. This book was released on 2006-05-01 with total page 198 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: One of the few books to explore lesbian parenting, these “hilarious, heart-wrenching, painfully honest tales of mommyhood” celebrate the ups and downs of being an LGBTQIA+ parent in the 21st century (Joey Solloway, creator of Transparent). After author Harlyn Aizley gave birth to her daughter, she watched in unanticipated horror as her partner scooped up the baby and said, “I'm your new mommy!” While they both had worked to find the perfect sperm donor, Aizley had spent nine months carrying the baby and hours in labor, so how could her partner claim to be their child's mommy? Many diapers later, Aizley began to appreciate the complexity of her partner’s new role as the other mother. Together, they searched for stories about families like their own, in which a woman has chosen to forgo her own birth experience so that she might support her partner in hers. They found very few. Now, in Confessions of the Other Mother, Aizley has put together an exciting collection of personal stories by women like her partner who are creating new parenting roles, redefining motherhood, and reshaping our view of two-parent families. Contributors include Hillary Goodridge, who was one of the lead plaintiffs in the case for same-sex marriage in Massachusetts, stand-up comedian Judy Gold, and psychologist and author Suzanne M. Johnson. This candid peek into a previously unexamined side of lesbian parenting is full of stories that are sometimes humorous, sometimes moving, but at all times celebratory. Each parenting tale sheds light on the many facets of motherhood, offering gay and straight readers alike a deeper understanding of what it means to love and parent in the twenty-first century.