The Great British Limerick Book

Download or read book The Great British Limerick Book written by Lewis Williams, Ass and published by . This book was released on 2015-04-16 with total page 320 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: Surely it can't be done. But it has been done. For the first time in the history of mankind someone has been dedicated enough and fool enough to write a filthy limerick for every town in the UK which unlike Leeds or Devizes doesn't already have a classic filthy limerick to call its own. From Land's End to John o' Groats, The Great British Limerick Book has a filthy limerick for your town, for your uncle's town, for your cousin's husband's ex-wife's town .... as long as it's in the UK and as long as it isn't one of those few places that are really impossible to find a rhyme for. There are over 900 limericks in the book. A lot of them are hilarious. Most of them are very funny. All of them are filthy. Guildford, Surrey. At McDonald's in Guildford in Surrey, I spilt coffee on my crotch in a scurry, I had to act quick, To cool down my dick, So I stuck it into my McFlurry. Nuneaton, Warwickshire. There was a young man from Nuneaton, Who really enjoyed being beaten, And squeezing his knackers, With a pair of nut crackers, And riding a bike with no seat on. Bath, Somerset. There was a professor from Bath, Who employed twenty-five research staff, To measure size and direction, Of his every erection, And to plot the results on a graph. The Isle of Skye, Scotland. When I was on the Isle of Skye, I overdid the old Spanish fly, I had a stiff member, From the fourth of December, Till Friday the tenth of July. Ashington, Northumberland. In Ashington there was a miner, Whose wife was a fashion designer, One night to his shock, She dressed him up as a cock, And herself as a six foot vagina. Hackney, Greater London. As a chemist I worked once in Hackney, And invented a treatment for acne, But one ingredi-ent, Was semen I'd spent, And they thought that good reason to sack me.

Download or read book The Mammoth Book of Limericks written by Glyn Rees and published by Running Press. This book was released on 2008-10-28 with total page 0 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: This is the best-ever collection of those catchy Irish rhymes – from squeaky-clean to the moderately filthy. With over 2,000 silly, political, modern, classic, and more to choose from, there is bound to be a limerick to get you giggling. This giant collection includes Irish classics called out in corner pubs for decades as well as many new verses specifically created to be read here. Creators include Spike Milligan, Mark Twain, Michael Palin, Lewis Carroll, Isaac Asimov, Robert Louis Stevenson, Rudyard Kipling, W.H. Auden, and many, many more.

Download or read book The Limerick. 1700 examples, with notes, variants and index written by Gershon Legman and published by . This book was released on 1953 with total page 517 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt:

Download or read book The Mammoth Book of Filthy Limericks written by Glyn Rees and published by Robinson Publishing. This book was released on 2009 with total page 512 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: The ultimate collection of X-rated and decidedly politically incorrect limericks! This bumper new volume contains over 2,000 dirty verses, from the moderately blue to the absolutely filthy - all illustrated throughout by Gray Jolliffe, creator of the bestselling Wicked Willie cartoon character. Here are verses so rude that even a blonde would blush, on subjects ranging from the bedroom to the bathroom and beyond. You'll find plenty of up-to-date limericks relevant to contemporary life as well as lewd old favourites on every imaginable topic, all of them guaranteed to make you laugh. Includes many newly devised limericks. On the breast of a barmaid named Gail Was written the price of the ale And on her behind, For the sake of the blind Was the same information in Braille.

Download or read book The Lure of the Limerick written by William S. Baring-Gould and published by Crown Pub. This book was released on 1979-12-01 with total page 246 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: Five hundred American and British limericks are interspersed with anecdotes and historical comment

Download or read book Silly Verse for Kids written by Spike Milligan and published by Puffin. This book was released on 2015 with total page 0 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: EDUCATIONAL: ENGLISH LITERATURE. This is a collection of the absurd, ridiculous, sublime and characteristically anarchic verse from the brilliant Spike Milligan. With his very own illustrations, this collection, which includes the famous On the Ning Nang Nong will make you laugh from the bottom of your belly - just like Spike did. Ages 9+.

Download or read book The New Limerick written by Gershon Legman and published by Random House Value Publishing. This book was released on 1980 with total page 784 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: