I Hate Your Guts

Download or read book I Hate Your Guts written by Jim Norton and published by Simon and Schuster. This book was released on 2008-11-04 with total page 290 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: When New York Times bestselling author and comedian Jim Norton isn't paying for massages with happy endings, or pretending to be fooled by transsexuals he picks up, he spends his time wondering what certain people would look like on fire... What do Heather Mills, the Reverend Al Sharpton, and Dr. Phil have in common? Jim Norton hates their guts. And he probably hates yours, too, especially if you're a New York Yankee, Starbucks employee, or Steve Martin. In thirty-five hilarious essays, New York Times bestselling author and comedian Jim Norton spews bile on the people he loathes. Enjoy his blistering attacks on Derek Jeter, Hillary Clinton, fatso Al Roker, and mush-mouthed Jesse Jackson. It's utterly hilarious -- and utterly relatable if you've ever bitten a stranger's face or thrown a bottle through the TV screen while watching the news. But don't think Jim just dishes loads of shit on his self-proclaimed enemies; he is equally atrocious to himself. He savages himself for his humiliating days as a white homeboy, his balletlike spins in the outfield during a little league game, and his embarrassingly botched attempt at a celebrity shout-out while taping his new HBO stand-up series. Uncomfortably honest, I Hate Your Guts is probably the best example of emotional vomiting you'll ever read. But there is hope; at the end of each essay, Jim generously offers helpful suggestions as to how the offender can make things right again: Eliot Spitzer: If you run for re-election, instead of shaking hands with voters, let them smell your fingers. Reverend Al Sharpton: The next time you feel the need to protest, do so dressed as an elk in Ted Nugent's backyard. Hillary Clinton: When you absolutely must make a point of laughing publicly, don't fake it. Just think of something that genuinely makes you laugh, like lowering taxes or any random male having his penis cut off. For the legions of devoted fans who know Jim Norton for his raw, sometimes brutal comedy, I Hate Your Guts is what you've been waiting for. But even more important -- it's a great book to read while taking a shit.

Download or read book Dear Andy Kaufman, I Hate Your Guts! written by and published by Process. This book was released on 2009-12 with total page 0 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: Famous for his role as Latka Gravas on TV's Taxi, appearances on Saturday Night Live and his own variety show, legendary eccentric performer Andy Kaufman provoked a national outrage in 1977 by taunting the women of America on TV and challenging them to wrestle him live on television. Thousands of fired-up females (and a few males) responded to the call. Kaufman received a torrent of impassioned challenges, hate mail and love letters from would-be wrestling contenders - all exhibited in this fascinating and sometimes bizarre collection.

Download or read book I Hate Your Guts, Ben Brooster written by Eth Clifford and published by Scholastic. This book was released on 1990-11 with total page 130 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: Nobody told Charlie that his cousin Ben was a genius. But when Ben comes to visit, Charlie finds out that part of Ben's genius is getting into trouble...bigtrouble!

Download or read book Guts: A Graphic Novel written by Raina Telgemeier and published by Scholastic Inc.. This book was released on 2019-09-17 with total page 227 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: A true story from Raina Telgemeier, the #1 New York Timesbestselling, multiple Eisner Award-winning author of Smile, Sisters, Drama, and Ghosts! Raina wakes up one night with a terrible upset stomach. Her mom has one, too, so it's probably just a bug. Raina eventually returns to school, where she's dealing with the usual highs and lows: friends, not-friends, and classmates who think the school year is just one long gross-out session. It soon becomes clear that Raina's tummy trouble isn't going away... and it coincides with her worries about food, school, and changing friendships. What's going on?Raina Telgemeier once again brings us a thoughtful, charming, and funny true story about growing up and gathering the courage to face -- and conquer -- her fears.

Download or read book Shorter Slang Dictionary written by Paul Beale and published by Routledge. This book was released on 2003-09-02 with total page 219 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: From abdabs to zit From pillock (14th century) to couch potato (20th century) From She'll be apples (Australia) to the pits (USA) This new collection brings together some 5,000 contemporary slang expressions originating in all parts of the English-speaking world. It gives clear and concise definitions of each word, supplemented by examples of their use and information about where and when they came into being. This entertaining reference work will be of use to students of English at all levels and a source of fascination to word-lovers throughout the world.

Download or read book How to Be You written by Jeffrey Marsh and published by Penguin. This book was released on 2016-08-02 with total page 210 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: Too short. Too weird. Too quiet. Not true. Let Internet superstar Jeffrey Marsh help you end those negative thoughts and discover how wonderful you are. An interactive experience, How to Be You invites you to make the book your own through activities such as coloring in charts, answering questions about how you do the things you do, and discovering patterns in your life that may be holding you back. Through Jeffrey's own story of "growing up fabulous in a small farming town"--along with the stories of hero/ines who have transcended the stereotypes of race, age, and gender--you will discover that you are not alone. Learn to deepen your relationship with yourself, boost your self-esteem and self-worth, and find the courage to take a leap that will change your life.

Download or read book High Conflict written by Amanda Ripley and published by Simon and Schuster. This book was released on 2022-04-05 with total page 368 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: "In the tradition of bestselling explainers like The Tipping Point, [this] book [is] based on cutting edge science that breaks down the idea of extreme conflict--the kind that paralyzes people and places--and then shows how to escape it"--